(via Wonkette) Greetings, fellow captives. Have you been asking yourself…
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Wire: New Pope insists on being nice to atheists and also driving an old Renault
Dang it, New Pope, you just keep being awesome, and saying stuff that makes us think you actually understand some of that Jesus stuff. For instance…
Wire: Dozens of neo-confederates plan rally to save Southern whiteness
(via Wonkette) Our good Tennessee blogfriend Southern Beale sends us a tip about a rally — if you can call something attended by “the tens not hundreds…
Wire: Secession is the new orange, which is the new black: Maryland edition
(via Wonkette) Man, what is it with Republicans whining about not getting everything they want, up to and including a pony for their birthday and a tiara…
Wire: Relive the Cold War in your very own underground apocalypse house
(via Wonkette) If you’re looking for a 15,000-square-foot luxury home that’s built 26 feet underground so it can survive a nuclear attack, and you have a spare $1.7…
Wire: Fox’s Eric Bolling has innovative idea: Save money by encouraging prison suicides
(via Wonkette) We weren’t planning to do anything on Ariel Castro’s suicide, because really, “horrible person kills self” is just not brimming with comedic possibilities…
Wire: Florida man cites ‘Bush Doctrine’ after shooting neighbors
Hey Florida! How’s it hanging? Kinda loose, and to the right of unfathomable idiot-crazy just like always maybe? Taking a cue from both Stand Your Ground and…
Wire: Texas fertilizer plants say no thanks to fire inspections, fire marshal sorry to have bothered them
(via Wonkette) As we all know, Texas is wide open for business, just waiting for your hot throbbing business to come and spray money all over the Lone Star State…
Neverending nice time: Aussie PM Kevin Rudd smacks down bible guy on gay marriage
(via Wonkette) Can we just say how totally in love we are with Australia’s Prime Minister Kevin Rudd this morning? Faced with a question/provocation from…
Liz Cheney Is ‘not pro-gay marriage’; is, however, world’s worst sister
Wyoming sure seems like a nice place. Lots of open space and fresh air — and a real nice Republican Senate primary about who hates gays the very most. Sen…
Wire: Georgia Insurance Commissioner proudly explains how he’s screwing up Obamacare to help everyone
(via Wonkette) Ralph Hudgens, the insurance commissioner for the great state of Georgia, recently bragged to a meeting of Republicans, “Let me tell you…
Wire: Pennsylvania GOP governor logically compares gay people to dumb little children
(via Wonkette) Pennsylvania Republican Governor Tom Corbett is not a happy man. He is bound and determined to stop a county-level municipal employee from…