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The anxiety that comes from living in the midst of a global pandemic is not exactly an aphrodisiac. For many of us, sex is the last thing on our minds. Others might find it an effective stress management tool, but struggle to feel safe with their partner(s) at a time when even Tinder has warned […]
Questions about love and sex in the Iowa City-Cedar Rapids area can be submitted to dearkiki@littlevillagemag.com, or anonymously using this form. Questions may be edited for clarity and length, and may appear either in print or online. Dear Kiki, My partner and I have recently opened up our marriage and TBH I’ve been super excited […]
Tasked with picking a fun and fluffy topic for my pre-Valentine’s Day column, I sat down to write around 1,200 words on anal sex — and found myself lacking in motivation. Musings on plugs and pegging were soon overshadowed by news about bushfires, plane crashes and impeachment trials. How am I supposed to write a fun-filled article about […]
Kinks — sexual desires attached to specific objects, acts or body parts that aren’t necessarily sexual in and of themselves — tend to be taboo at the dinner table, but they’re more common than you might think. The Journal of Sex Research found one in three people have experimented with paraphilia, or unusual sexual interests, at some […]
Dear Kiki, I’ve noticed lately that normal monthly ovulation-related horniness manifests as a really strong desire to screw around on my partner. It drives me to distraction and I enjoy every second! I feel like I’d risk it all in the span of two days just to screw around for a good time. The hunt! The escape! The danger! The hot, no-strings-attached sex! I […]
Dear Kiki, I have a very personal question. I love my husband more than anything else in the world, but over the past few years we have been having very little sex (perhaps once a month). We still “get along” amazingly well and he’s still my best friend, but the fact that we don’t have sex very often is always in the back of my mind (and his, too). […]
Think back to the first time you felt sexy feelings. I’m pretty sure my first “tingly” thoughts involved watching David Bowie in Labyrinth, with his very impressive bulge. I also distinctly remember sneaking a peek at softcore porn on staticy channels like HBO or Cinemax late at night. (Think of the TV screen in Poltergeist, but instead of a swirly ghost […]
“When you’re overweight, your body becomes a matter of public record in many respects,” wrote Roxane Gay in her book Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body. “Your body is constantly and prominently on display. People project assumed narratives onto your body and are not at all interested in the truth of your body, whatever that truth might be. […]
One of my best friends was recently married to a wonderful man who I think is a perfect fit for her. After the wedding he began reaching out to me via Facebook Messenger in order to — as I first assumed — get to know me better. However, the conversation on his end soon shifted from typical banter to topics that make me feel uncomfortable […]
About a month ago I developed a sexual relationship with my significant other’s son. My children have now disowned me calling the relationship disgusting, a poor decision, and inappropriate. The way I see it, other than the age gap of 25 years, we are both single, both adults, we are not related. Do you think my children are correct in their perception of this relationship and if so, for what reasons? […]
I gave Shalisa Gladney a hug when she emerged from her office to greet me at the University of Iowa Women’s Resource and Action Center. During our conversation, much of which focused on relationships and consent, Gladney admitted she is not a hugger — I had neglected to check before going in for an embrace. But she […]
“I’m a 65-year-old, semi-retired, BDSM-loving, cross-dressing, kinky, fetishy baby-boomer in decent condition. I’m not afraid to be beaten until I cry. I’m highly breast-envious. I’m just looking for someone to love and play with, but the women I’ve fallen for have never been into this stuff.” […]
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