Safety warning: Rope can be a dangerous practice. Please use caution and communication when tying your partner. Always have safety EMS scissors within reach. Do not practice rope when consuming substances that can alter your mental state. Enthusiastic consent is mandatory for both parties. Lastly, have fun!
Materials
- 30-40 feet of cotton-braided rope
- EMS safety scissors
Basic Body Harness
1. Fold your 30-40-foot rope in half, and place over your partner’s shoulders and neck.
2. Tie four standard overhand knots with your doubled rope the length of your partner’s upper half, starting at the clavicle. Each knot should be roughly one hand length from the previous knot.
3. Next, take both strands of leftover rope up between your partner’s legs, so the rope is now at the back of the body.
4. Finally, take one rope in each hand. Reach around the front of your partner and loop each strand of rope through the coordinating section between the knots.
5. Repeat step 4, creating a criss-cross pattern in the back, and a diamond pattern in the front.
6. Once you reach the top section, just tie in a bow in the back. Do NOT loop through by the neck.
7. Not recommended for long-term wear; check with your partner on comfort.
Double Column Rope Cuff
1. Fold your 10-foot rope in half, and wrap around your partner’s wrists in an orderly manner 2.5 times, finishing with both ends of rope on top.
2. Rotate both rope ends clockwise a half turn. This should make an L shape, as shown in the diagram.
3. Take the folded end of your rope, also known as the bight, and pull it down between your partner’s arms and back up between their hands. This creates the cuff shape.
4. Use the bight to tie a knot on the top of the cuffs. Do NOT try to cinch the cuffs to be extremely tight. There should be enough space to fit two fingers between the rope and your partner’s skin.
A message from Kiki
The dom/sub relationship can be a tricky one to tease out, both for folks on the outside looking in and for interested parties new to play. It’s a relationship that’s all about control and power, but it’s the sub who holds both, not the dom. Anyone who performs the actions of a dom with only their own pleasure in mind and without those truly magic words, ENTHUSIASTIC CONSENT, isn’t a dom, they’re an abuser.
The gift of bondage and other forms of play is that it codifies and requires the kind of open communication that can be hard to access in a more traditional relationship. It’s a level of intimacy and trust that takes a lot of work to achieve. And it appeals across a wide spectrum of players.
If you’re interested in exploring either domming or subbing, and you’re currently in a relationship, start with long conversations with your partner about what’s truly required of each party. Bring in an expert, if you’re confused! And always have each other’s backs, even (especially) while you’re striking them.
xoxo, Kiki
