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Savage Love: Porn and Circumstances

Savage Love

My fiancée is extremely bothered by me looking at porn. It revolves around insecurities that have gotten so bad that even other girls bother her. (We can hardly go to a beach anymore.) I don’t have any weird relationship with porn—no addiction, no violent stuff, and I look pretty infrequently. She acknowledges that it’s a […]

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Savage Love: Programming notes

Savage Love

I have been wearing bras and panties with stockings for so long now, it’s become a part of me, and I was wondering if you have heard of this before. — Sent From Samsung Mobile People wearing bras and panties and stockings—that is something I’ve heard of before. A quick programming note: Some weeks, half […]

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Savage Love: At the Neptune

Savage Love

We just did a live taping of the Savage Lovecast at Seattle’s Neptune Theatre. Audience members submitted more questions — anonymously, on index cards — than we could possibly answer during the Q&A segment of the show. So I’m answering some of the questions we didn’t get to in this week’s column. […]

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Savage Love: Labia of love

Savage Love

I have been insecure about the way my vagina looks for as long as I can remember. When I was young, I would fantasize about the day I would grow pubic hair long enough to cover its unsightliness. That day never came, and I was left with an enormous insecurity about it. My labia minora […]

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Savage Love: Sticking points

I am a 30-year-old trans guy, on T since college, happy and comfortable with my sexuality. However, I can’t find any helpful health info on a fetish I’ve developed: I insert needles directly into my clit, maybe an inch and a half in. I’m not talking through it, like a piercing, but into it, going […]

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Savage Love: Spank U

Savage Love

Is this even Dan? Probably not, probably an assistant, but maybe this will eventually get to him. I have a spanking fetish. I love to be spanked. I live in Oakland, California, so San Francisco is 10 minutes away. Seems like I’m in one of the best places in the country to have a kink, […]

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Savage Love: Rings and things

Savage Love

I’m a twentysomething married trans guy in an openish marriage. In the online hunt for a guy to have some aboveboard, under-the-sheets fun with, I run into snags because I’m trans (I disclose on my profile) and because I’m married. I’m baby-stepping my way toward an offline search for guys, going to events hosted by […]

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Savage Love: Polyproblema

Savage Love

Four years ago, I met a man on a “married but looking” website. We exchanged fantasies, which included wanting to have threesomes and a D/s relationship. He was 19 years my senior. I was 42 at the time. For three years, we met twice a week for drinks or sex. The sex was amazing. We […]

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Savage Love: Friends in Need

Illustration by Joe Newton

A straight male friend practices sounding and has for years. I am pretty sure he does other things that he isn’t telling anyone about — not even his wife. He has some medical questions about sounding. I am a pediatric nurse, so he brought his concerns to me, but the questions are totally outside my […]

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Savage Love: Crazy in love

Savage Love

My wife and I went through a long-distance period when we were still dating and she went away to school. I used porn as a masturbatory aid during that time. I did not tell her this, as she believes that porn use is equivalent to cheating. Well, fast-forward a couple years (and a marriage), and […]

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Savage Love: Working out the kinks

Savage Love

My boyfriend of two years cannot climax or maintain an erection unless his testicles are handled, squeezed, pulled, or pressed on (preferably with my stockinged foot or knee). Needless to say, intercourse does not work very well, and our sexual repertoire is rather limited, which is frustrating for both of us. His doctor says his […]

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